I took part in several conversations yesterday about crying while reading. Do you do it?
I do. I cry every single time I read Persuasion. I weep buckets reading epic fantasy (anything from C.L. Wilson to the Chronicles of Narnia — and I actually won’t read The Last Battle anymore because I have such a visceral reaction to my memory of sobbing all the way through that horrible travesty tragedy). I cry whenever they kill animals in fiction (do not get me started on George Orwell, the bastard, or John Steinbeck, may he rot). My high school English teacher probably remembers to this day the girl who came into her classroom during lunch period, and cried on her shoulder over A Separate Peace. I love a good cathartic cry over a piece of fiction.
Now, for the second part of the question, for you writers out there: do you cry over anything you’ve written?
I haven’t done so until recently, and, prior to Secret Society Girl, I wrote some dark books. I admit I felt a bit sniffly a few times near the end of Rites of Spring (Break), but, much like Amy, I bucked up and soldiered on. But there is one part of Rampant that I have never, in the more than a year since I’ve written it, been able to read without turning on the waterworks, and there’s a scene in Tap & Gown that made me cry as well. (It’s not one you’d think, though).
The crying has continued apace, especially with my current manuscript, though given the protagonist’s state of mind (daaaaaaaarrrrrrrrkkkkkk) it should probably be expected. She’s in a bad, bad place, and it seems I have at last figured out how to torture my characters. Um, yippee?
Seriously, protagonist. It’s spring. There are tulips coming up in my yard. My dog is adorable. I did not sign up to be Method!
I read something once that said that, as a writer, if you expect your reader to chuckle, you should be in hysterics, and if you expect them to shed a tear, you should weep buckets. I suppose this is a way of saying you have to feel things strongly if you expect the reader to feel anything at all. Because some folks just aren’t the crying type.
Though two readers (and there haven’t been that many readers yet) have already told me that Tap & Gown made them cry. Um, yay? And here I thought I was writing a comedy!
March 27th, 2009 at 9:06 am
I can cry over spilled milk if I am in an emotional state but I ususally don’t cry over books or movies. I say usually because Nicholas Sparks books and movies make me weep. The Notebook is that movie I love (yummy ryan gossling) but without a doubt make me cry. The only other movie that made me cry was love actually, I really don’t have a clue why but I just do. ::shrugs::
I can’t answer the second questions because I am not a writer and nothing I have written during my education was ever powerful enough to shed a tear.
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March 27th, 2009 at 9:12 am
This is a great post, Diana. Great, because I was wondering the same thing recently, namely, whether other writers cry over what they write.
Yes, I tear up at other people’s books, like the Narnia stories. So far not yours, not yet. But my own?
Since I started writing fiction for the first time last summer, I’ve finished (more or less) five books. A pentalogy, so there. Goes you one better.
And I weep copiously every time I pull one up to work on it a little more, or to try to find those last pesky typos. My sinuses go into overdrive. Forget the old measurements of the one-hanky or two-hanky book. We’re talking multible boxes of tissues here.
Why is this? Partly because I love my characters, and I admire their verve and audacity so much. Partly because I love the way they speak (I’m just the transcriber here, you understand). You’d think that by now I’d be immune to my own words. But I’m not.
I read something once that said that, as a writer, if you expect your reader to chuckle, you should be in hysterics, and if you expect them to shed a tear, you should weep buckets.
That says it all, for me, at least. Thanks again for a great post!
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March 27th, 2009 at 9:22 am
Ha! I was going to do a blog post on this too–it sparked such interesting conversation yesterday. But as I’m way too sleepy to post anything substantial, I’m glad you did instead.
And someone’s already told ME that Tap and Gown made them cry, too! I look forward to it!
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March 27th, 2009 at 9:38 am
I have to say that I cry during movies or while reading books. There are a few writers that can make me cry at the drop of a hat, one in particular being Diana Gabaldon. There is no set of books that have made me cry more.
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March 27th, 2009 at 9:40 am
I love a good cry when reading (unless it’s a Nicholas Sparks novel, and then I’m just expecting it and disappointed by the end). I cry every time I read The Time Traveler’s Wife. I know what is going to happen at the end (the way the story is set up, you know how it will end even if it’s the first time you read it), but I still bawl my eyes out and feel very emotional for days.
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March 27th, 2009 at 9:47 am
I rarely cry when reading books or movies — and when I do I resent it! I’m not a cathartic crier.
But if I get a little misty eyed (which happens sometimes with romances) that is a good thing.
I’m with you on Orwell.
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March 27th, 2009 at 10:17 am
I was just telling my daughter this morning,as I was braiding her hair, to avoid reading Where The Red Fern Grows. We both cry over animal deaths in books and seeing her cry over Desser The Best Ever Cat by Maggie Smith BROKE MY HEART.
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March 27th, 2009 at 10:19 am
I definitely cry when reading certain books. I cried near the end of “His Majesty’s Dragon,” and there’s at least one scene in every Harry Potter book that makes me break down. And movies hit me even harder sometimes. (I think because I can SEE the pain instead of being able to skim it if I’m not in a place to deal with it.) I definitely cry when Elinor breaks down in Emma Thompson’s version of “Sense & Sensibility.”
I don’t think I’ve actually cried writing any of my books yet, but I haven’t had “that scene” in any book yet. I definitely go to the dark place to write a particular character’s grief, but he’s VERY emotionally bottled-up, so it’s on and off with him. Leaves me feeling like crap the rest of the day, but hey, if it makes the book better, I’ll go with it.
And I totally agree with you- I did NOT sign up to be Method, but apparently I just am!
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March 27th, 2009 at 10:26 am
I didn’t even *talk* about movies because I’m such a mess watching them. I was watching MILK this weekend — cried when Harvey got that phone call from the kid in the wheelchair.
That scene in Thompson’s S&S makes me cry, too. Love that movie.
But any version of Persuasion kills me. Movie, book, anything. The cray avocado 70s BBC version made me sob like a baby, for ages.
And it’s an old joke in our house that Before Sunrise hits SB, while Before Sunset KILLS me, and I’m not a fan of the first — or wasn’t, until I saw the second. I think I cried for half an hour the first time I saw it, and then SB came home and asked me why my eyes were all red and I started up again. I’m tearing up just thinking about it!
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March 27th, 2009 at 10:54 am
I used to never cry but for some reason that’s changed. I cried during a Scrubs episode the other night! I cried reading The Time Travellers Wife and PS I Love You. I don’t think I ever cried writing The Forest of Hands and Teeth though I’ve been told by some readers that they’ve cried over it.
But I definitely did feel like I’d been punched in the gut when I realized I had to kill off a character I loved…
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March 27th, 2009 at 11:16 am
While reading, I’m usually pretty hardhearted…I’m emotionally engaged but I can’t remember the last time I cried while reading. Maybe over the last Harry Potter book, but that was mostly because I couldn’t believe it was over.
Movies make me sad, though. The last half-hour of the Return of the King is always gutwrenching.
As for writing…I’ve cried once. I had to kill a protagonist’s parent; I was up writing at midnight because I was finishing the novel; it was horrible. But killing the character was the right decision.
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March 27th, 2009 at 12:02 pm
I cried over a book once. I think it was a Bridge to Terabithia when I was a child. But other than that, clearly I am too manly to cry!
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March 27th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
I cry all the time at books and movies (I’ve even been known to cry at an advert) I get so emotional invested I can’t help it but I actually like that. T&G had made me cry once and well up once and I’m not done yet. I’m wondering where you cried now.
I think Philip Pullman’s trilogy has to be the worst for setting me off. And Goodbye Mog I cried reading it to a bunch of dry eyed five year olds – children are hard!
As to writing I’ve only made myself cry once, maybe because I know it will work out okay
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March 27th, 2009 at 12:09 pm
Ok, wait, wait. Diana and sara, are you telling me you cried over Animal Farm? When Boxer got sent to the glue factory? Is that what you’re telling me? You guys would not have lasted five seconds during my presentation yesterday on Animal Farm. Although I guess it makes my thesis of Animal Farm as elegy that much more feasible.
Like Heather, if I’m emotional, I can cry over anything. I actually distinctly remember the first time I cried over a movie, and the first time I *really* cried over a movie. The former was Sense & Sensibility as well–when Marianne runs out in the rain to see Willoughby’s house, and she starts crying. I teared up a bit. The latter was on a plane back from a service trip in Calcutta, and I was watching INDEPENDENCE DAY. I’m not kidding, I literally started SOBBING because everyone was going to die, and that’s how I felt about all of the people I’d met on the streets in India. I think that’s the first time I kind of really tapped into my emotions that way. I’ve been a total basket case since.
Bjork’s Dancer in the Dark (movie) and Charles Frazier’s Cold Mountain made me cry so much that I can never, ever watch/read them again. They’re just too depressing.
I always cry during Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind at that scene when Joel realizes that he can’t stop himself from losing his memories of Clementine, and he says, “Just enjoy it.” I’m tearing up just thinking about it!
Lately I cry over happy stuff as well, so I can guarantee you that I’ll probably cry during T&G, just because it’s coming to an end, and it’s been such a pleasure reading it.
If you guys loved that Emma Thompson S&S, you should definitely check out the 2008 BBC one. I guarantee you’ll cry buckets over the Elinor breakdown in that one.
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March 27th, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Brynne, RotK makes me cry like a baby. Sean Astin was robbed of an Oscar, I tell you. when he’s alone,a dn crying,a nd then when he saves frodo, and then when he saves Frodo again, and then…. yeah. cry cry cry.
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March 27th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
I don’t cry much at books. Generally it comes from a desire to look at the world and laugh rather than cry, which possibly comes across as shallow. Not that I’m callously laughing when the main character of Island of the Blue Dolphins loses her younger brother (I recall that actually making me cry when I read it in the fourth grade, so this is probably a bad example. I also hated Island of the Blue Dolphins), but I just tend to read happier books that probably don’t have as much tear-jerking as others.
Movies are a different story. I sniffled my way through “We Are Marshall,” and heck, the first Battlestar Galactica miniseries had me a few times. I’ve even cried a bit at different Buffy the Vampire Slayer moments (when she sends Angel to hell, when Giles tricks her into confessing to it, Xander’s speech to Willow at the end of season six…okay, so I cry a lot during Buffy, apparently).
My goal, someday, is to write a scene about chopping onions so realistically that people will cry sympathetic tears. I’ve only cried once or twice while writing, and I generally felt foolish about it the next day. It might be cool to someday have a scene where I sniffle every time. That’s likely the mark of a really, really good scene.
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March 27th, 2009 at 1:34 pm
The Notebook the MOVIE made me cry. Also, seeeeexxxxxxxy.
Patrick, Terabithia also made me cry. I have not seen the movie. It’s plenty manly to cry at that classic, think.
Alexa, you must email me and tell me what scene! Also, Pullman. Yeah, buckets of tears at That Scene, which they thankfully removed from the movie (“Ratter, Ratter…”) Torturing children is like killing animals in books.
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March 27th, 2009 at 1:37 pm
Tiff! We shall not mention glue factories here on the blog! Watch yourself or I shall ban you!
INDEPENDENCE DAY also made me cry. That’s how I knew I was going to love that chick in Battlestar Galactica (which I did, and the miniseries made me cry too). Also, when the dog SURVIVED.
Though, funny story, I hadn’t seen that movie in years, and it was on TV one night in a hostel in Australia in 2004, and we all gathered to watch it,a nd as soon as the aliens starting blowing stuff up, the Americans all stood and left the room. It was the first time any of us had watched ID since 9/11, and we kinda couldn’t take it.
Couldn’t finish Dancer. Knew it would be too tough. Also couldn’t watch Schindler’s List or similar. I don’t like sad movies, mostly. I cry at the Incredibles. The airplane scene.
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March 27th, 2009 at 1:39 pm
Oh I love Island of the Blue Dolphins! All those “teen survives alone in the wilderness” books, really.
Buffy makes me cry a lot, too. I definitely cried at the finale. I cried when Buffy died. I cried at The Body. I cried when Willow found out Xander had lost his virginity. I cried when Oz left. Both times.
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March 27th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
Add me to the list of literary sobbers. It all started for me when Bambi\’s mother died. And don\’t get me started on the death of the spider in Charlotte\’s web. After about age 7, I scrupulously avoided any books with animals in them, as I am particularly susceptible. But alas in school I couldn\’t avoid Animal Farm. The one that really did me in, though, was Flowers for Algernon. Cried buckets. When I was pregnant, it got even worse (I would tear up over those phone company commercials, lol). Recent years, the one that got me the most was James Patterson\’s Suzanne\’s Diary for Nicholas, and You\’ve Got Mail when she remembers \”spinning\” with her mom as she closes her store for the last time to make room for a Baby Gap
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March 27th, 2009 at 2:39 pm
I’m not a big crier, but animals dying always gets to me. I always, always cry when I read Where the Red Fern Grows, and I bawled when I finished reading Marley & Me. Watership Down, Velveteen Rabbit, Charlotte’s Web …
Character deaths don’t bother me as much, unless I’m really invested in the characters. Although I did cry when Dumbledore died in Harry Potter.
And Grey’s Anatomy has a weird ability to occasionally make me teary-eyed.
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March 27th, 2009 at 3:48 pm
I have to say, I have never forgiven Katherine Patterson for Bridge to Terebithia. The first book I cried at, at tender in third grade. I then vowed I wouldn’t cry at things so easily again. Except then I read “The Arm of the Starfish” by L’Engle, and I sobbed, because her books aren’t supposed to end that way! And I loved the character! (I still tear up reading that part.)
I don’t know if I’ll ever get to the point where my own writing makes me cry, if just because of the weird place I go to in my brain. But I haven’t stuck with characters over a series or anything, so I don’t know if that would change. Also, one of my favorite suspense-thriller authors talked about how she was devestated when she realized one of her characters had to die, and cried the whole process of writing his death.
I cry at sports montages/overcoming impossible odds to compete things more than anything. Oh, and Field of Dreams. The minute the music starts, I am crying.
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March 27th, 2009 at 4:28 pm
oh, random story (I was gonna add this earlier, but I forgot): So earlier today I’m prepping for an upcoming backpacking trip by doing some research on Bath, and I find this great Jane Austen audio tour where you can walk along and listen to bits of Persuasion that take place where you’re walking (I downloaded the whole tour, though sadly I probably won’t have time for it all because the bus only stops there for 2.5 hours).
Right afterward, I remember I haven’t checked your blog yet today and Persuasion is mentioned by the third sentence. It was very odd. To say the least.
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March 27th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
I’m not usually a crier, like at all. Not watching movies or reading books and I don’t write anything that isn’t for school (with the occasional exception for blogs) and there is no crying there.
But my eyes well up in Pullman’s Trilogy, right at the end when Will and Lyra have to leave each other. Other than that, I can’t remember ever getting really teary-eyed or choked up when reading or watching a movie.
I think harm to animals and children is horrible; but I don’t cry. It gets me pissed off though. Maybe it’s my education/training in politics and the ability to not personalize things like that.
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March 30th, 2009 at 1:54 am
Yeah, I’ve been known to cry over books. Notably Middlemarch and How Green Was My Valley. Those two books. Every time. More recently, the last Harry Potter and The Book Thief. But if you don’t cry at the The Book Thief you are dead inside.
Great. Now I’m worried about your current protagonist. And I don’t even know who she is or when I will meet her.
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